Perspective Shift
I notice things. I know when my husband embraces me, he holds on longer than most people. These few extra seconds of his time make him an exceptional hugger. Art for me has always been about expression and connection – a miraculous happening linking two moments in time that often moves me to tears. I admire a business card for thoughtful details like the weight of the paper. I do a double-take when I see a great outfit on the street because I understand this very personal form of self-expression - style. I get lost in the moment when I witness someone (be it a musician, an athlete or my mother at work) in their element and at their peak - in total awe of the ease with which they excel.
Apparently, this trait has a name: Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence.
It is one of my character strengths (based on concepts from Positive Psychology). Honestly, when I saw this among my top five strengths, I was a little deflated and confused. Upon first glance of the list of 24 traits, I had predetermined which ones I thought were best and, therefore, which ones I wanted to possess. But there’s no arguing with a computer screen. My results were in and “Appreciation…” was in my top five.
Curiosity got the better of me and I had to find out what exactly this trait was all about. I went in skeptical and came out illuminated. This piece of me that I’d always thought of as superficial and trivial is actually a humbling and inspiring way I process the world – a strength, a gift even.
I appreciate the smallest detail as well as the large effects they make. It’s what makes me so good at being a mirror – I see you. I see your strengths, your efforts, your desires. Imperfections are relative. Mistakes are merely the unavoidable casualties of a life lived. Instead of making them tormenters, can we allow them to be teachers?
I didn’t know my joy in eating a well-plated meal or putting on a great outfit was a strength. I didn’t know the ability to identify what brings me joy is powerful. We are all discovering ourselves over the course of our lifetimes. Creating a more formal journey for myself has introduced me to even more. How might you see yourself differently if you paused to appreciate who you are? What if the only thing you needed to “be” was more yourself?
Society lives in a black and white world. It teaches good and bad, strong and weak. But these are truths only if you believe them. The real truth is ANY trait has the power to be a strength or a weakness when out of balance. When we stop living in our shadows and start living in our light, we are brilliant. Acceptance and love are powerful, especially when turned inwards.
Changing how we see, changes what we see.
Want some help with perspective? You can learn about yourself through this lengthy, but insightful, survey (https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register). I took this a few years ago and found it has changed the way I see myself and those around me. I’d love to hear your thoughts if you decide to investigate.
Survey or not, remember that we are all a little bit of many things and rather than try to become someone else, try to embrace and own your strengths. That means when we work from a place of abundance (what we have lots of and comes naturally), we are more successful. There is less try and more flow.
