Believing - A Life Experiment

I have been working my way to this point for some time now. I’ve said it before – it matters what you believe. Well, I have worked really hard to believe in this simple idea: good things can come easily. 

Discipline and hard work have never been a problem for me. Much of what I have accomplished in my life has been through sheer force. Once I set my sights on something, I’m quite determined. That mentality worked well for me for many years. I accomplished just about everything I set my mind to. But I also found myself burning out. It’s impossible for me to maintain that kind of high-energy without sacrificing something like my health or my sanity. During a recent life pause, I began to ask myself, “what if”? What if I looked at my life as an experiment? A experiment in faith* and trust. What if I took some time (I’m going to say a year) to really, and I mean really, have faith in a simple idea: 

My heart is at ease knowing what is meant for me will never miss me, and that which misses me was never meant for me.

Imam al Shafi’i

What I’m realizing this means is that I get to be me and all that energy I put towards my hopes, dreams and to-dos is all I need to do. Focus on the things I can control and let go of the rest. This idea is simultaneously what I most desire and what I find most difficult. I’m reminded of lyrics from a Pink song, “I don’t want control. I want to let go.” How exhilarating!

I wonder too, what’s the worst that could happen if I believe this? I know my old self wouldn’t have allowed for this kind of unpredictability. But I know now that whether I want to believe or not, it’s what happens (and always has). I just used to spend a whole lot of energy worrying. So, this year I’m doing it. I jumping in. I’m going along for the ride. What a change to feel nothing but excitement for what I don’t know is coming. And to be so connected to the Universe that I’m certain my dreams lie within it. 

*Faith does not require religion. Faith for me is a belief in something greater. It is my spiritual connection to everything around me and within me.